Heaven sends not only desperation to me.

Yes, sometimes it sends some hope.

A teaspoon per day, a day per month or two.

I know, I care, "Thou shalt never complain", and all that,

But how miserably it is, to fall from the seventh heaven to the solid ground!

To open my eyes and notice the same cheap scene again and again!

Ok, who am I to judge?

Such a feeling…

I can't walk. I can't stand. I can't sit.

Yes, I can do nothing when I feel that something

Painful for me happens behind my back.

I’m looking through my window and notice snow falling from the skies.

This is the sorrow falling.

Ten minutes before I was there and it fell on my face

Snow in March? Curious. But true. How my misery is.

Once heard – will never forget. Yes, I am feeling this pain now,

The pain of loneliness. Alone. Every day I am alone, even in dreams

(tho' I don't see them). Nobody’s near me. Nobody wants to know me.

And nothing lights the end of the tunnel, nothing. Nothing...